Luncheon Meat In A Tin Can

LIKE MINDED SINGAPOREANS!

2006-05-14T22:39:00.000+08:00

The Sunday times (14th May 2006) featured an article on a group of Singaporean amateur film makers who are simply out to have fun.

Check this out...

99 Indians (Jay-Z spoof)

Linkin' Park spoof

I believe there are a few other clips from these buncha guys who named themselves Indian Park. Do check 'em out on Youtube!

Surely we can do better??!

We like papaya! (Relight my fire!)

2006-04-16T17:37:00.000+08:00

OOosshh!!!

Yes, today's makan session after soccer has sparked a breath of life into our fledging video project! But I suspect the sudden enthusiasm will die down very soon...Hahaha... But let's strike at the iron while its hot, yeah?

Anyway, I feel it would be better to do a parody of life in Singapore, instead of racking our brains to come up with a plot. Our short films should revolve around the recent issues that grapples the lives of ordinary sillyporeans.

For starters, you guys can read this very funny comic by one of the sunday times artist: Chewonit!

Coming up... General Elections 2006! and the indifference of sillyporeans towards nation building and giving a strong mandate to PM Lee!!!

Come on! Let the juices flow!!!

General themes:

What about crushing the opposition (what opposition?!)
Antics of opposition members (Case in point: NMP Steve Chia's nude photography "hobby")
Squeeky clean PAP party members who have never watched porn or masturbate before (in his entire life?!) Hmm...
Bo-chup, heckcare attitude during election period
Rather be out playing having fun in the sun at bintan
Drawing on ballot slips / Voting done in a split second (brainless choice anyway)
Constable A-cai comes knocking on your door - asks you why you never vote (PAP)?
Voting is sacred - YOUR vote matters! Failing which will result in you getting sent to the Gobi deserts for corrective training.

Progress package goodies given out by the gahmen.

General themes:

New topic of discussion at the office/wet market/coffee shop- comparing how much you receive
Complaining the monetary incentive is nothing but a ploy to get you to vote for the PAP, then laugh your guts out at the sudden windfall.
Mad scramble to signup to get the cash - then spend it away all at once on a luxury ticket item on 1st May (date when the money has been credited into our accounts)
Bet all of the money on 4D/Toto/Sweepstakes and hope tee-gong po-pee huat ah!!! (In actual fact, is donating money back to Singapore gahmen coffers again... -__-")
Why choose trouble? Take the money from the gahmen and tick PAP on the ballot slip (with one solitary tear drop streaming down your cheek... WIPE IT AWAY ALREADY!)

Some great ideas already right? What do you guys think? Please feel free to add onto whatever has been written here...

Idea Number #2

2006-04-16T17:15:00.000+08:00

Title of our drama:
You Nicked Lee!
Sing A Poo-Lala

Big idea: This will be a quality drama explaining the uniqueness of our beloved country with heavy satire. Right from the heartlands, we will deliver and present the most profound soul of the average HDB dweller (us, and whoever wants to act). Spiced with Stephen Chow influenced humour, it will put the Tourism board to shame by showing people what is really special in this home of ours.

Characters: Squeeky clean Lee who never surfed porn in his entire life with his bunch of friends

Plot: Lee (who is about to depart to Oxford to study law) and his bunch of friends who are having their holiday thinks of things to fill up their time.

General concepts to explore:

1. S-league betting
2. Ah bangs singing at the void decks
3. Impeccable Singlish
4. Ah bengs at basketball court
5. Ah Lian Ban Mian
6. Yang Tze cinema

Please feel free to comment..

I'm back!@!!#!

2006-04-16T17:04:00.000+08:00

500 bucks Canon DV cam. Not enough participants to invest. Nonetheless, we shall borrow one first to kick start our dream to make the first quality online serial drama. No funding = no go. Reality's hard to handle but when the going gets tough, only the tough gets going.

My experience with low budget film production is fucking bad. You waste your friends' time. Most of them do it for free. If we don't plan things well, we will become bastards. So why not let's work on the script first. Since we are on a budget, we have to think of something that we can do with our teenie weenie resources. No need sets, no need props. I will list down the things that we have access to:

1. Simei blk 157 #08-230 and void deck - free space for filming
2. My mac to do editing
3. My audio production equipment
4. 3 willing actors..Kiat, me and monget..more maybe after persuasion?

We will need:

1. Camera with wide angle lens
2. Boom mic and holder
3. Tripod

Please ask around to borrow the above equipment.

KING JAMES KONG

2006-02-11T01:19:00.000+08:00

Johor Bahru -- Villagers in a remote kampung off the offskirts of a small quaint town of Sungei Busuk have claimed the appearance of a mysterious man-beast, known as the malaysian version of their very own bigfoot. The sudden news has sparked widespread interest among the curious folks of this otherwise quiet town of about 1,000 whose main livelihood involves around coconut trees and banana trade.

At the same time, a bunch of ordinary singaporeans have pondered over the sudden disappearance of their primitive-like friend at frequent intervals, sometimes stretching to days at one go. When the said suspect is queried about his absence over several outings, he refuses to shed any light on the matter, leading his friends to suspect that he just might be the very same creature villagers in Sungei Busuk claimed to have seen in the forests nearby.

A photo taken by a high surveillance security team from the malaysian forestry department revealed this stunning picture of the abominable bigfoot apparently taking a cautious walk across the dense forest cover to retrieve food and water. Sgt Abuboo exclaimed: " Sial lah, appa ini machiam?! Really got big monknet in malaysia sia! "

Exclusive pictures published on malaysian dailies, The New Straits Times and The Star drew citizens to grab up every single available copies as the nation comes to grasps with the exciting situation about to unfold right in their own backyard.

However in Singapore, the reaction to this big hoo-ha is quite contrary to the one in Malaysia. In response to the pictures that papers in Malaysia published, the very same group of Singaporeans has sent in a photo which seeks to debunk the myth of the bigfoot in malaysia. Said a highly confident spokesperson for the group with a smug look on his face, Mr. Doong Shiwen: " We have every reason to believe that the bigfoot our brudders from across the causeway sighted, is indeed our beloved friend, Mr. James Koh Chink Egg. Notice the similarity in the pictures we have on our hands. " He proceeds to reveal a set of photo which displays stunningly similar features between the man-ape and the young man.

The Singapore Prevention of Cruelty to Animals Association has raised concern over the welfare of the suspect man-ape in Johor Bahru and will be despatching a volunteer group to monitor the situation and attend to the needs of the loose wild primate if they should stumble upon the elusive creature.

Meanwhile, the controversy surrounding the man-ape James Koh has his friends coming up with several theories for his sudden disappearance. Most are irrevelant, due to the crappy shit that always comes out of the group, but, the most logical of all has to be the one which scrutinizes his genetical history. Again, the ever-confident spokesman of the group, Doong Shiwen has this to say: " Since young, James has this weird tendency to behave instinctively like the primate species while going about his daily life. We suspect all along that it is inherent, and that may only be the tip of the iceberg which will lead us to even more shocking discoveries about his true origins. "

The rest of the group nods in agreement, and also came up with another theory for the public to speculate on: that there may be MORE of James' secretive man-ape species hidden away in the dense forests of JB, oblivious to the advance of the modern world happening at lightning pace around them.

The truth is out there people. Seeing is as good as believing...

Where is the dream???

2006-01-27T23:42:00.000+08:00

OMFG!!!

C'mon people, spark some life into our brainchild please???

The luncheon meat has already gone stale liao!!!

What happened to the initial enthusiasm? What happened to our passion?? What happened to this vision we once shared?

And bob, where is the Canon camcorder??? :S

The Free Man's Last Post

2005-11-30T21:04:00.000+08:00

The rain may fall, and the sun may shine but none shall dampen my spirit to see this film materialise. In the light of events that happened during last sunday's soccer session, may I propose that daniu be on our next hit list? Hahaha. I'm starting work tomorrow and this will be my final contribution as a free man before I officially become a prisoner of working life.

Mongnet's embarassing moments continued...

On suggestions with regards to the mode of serving, the wise one asked: "So guys, shall we have buffet style or ah-la-kart-te?" *momentary pause from the gang* Meanwhile, a crow flew past and the chinese tea which I was pouring into someone else's glass overflowed because time just stood still. "I take it to mean that you are trying to say ala carte? " I asked. "Urrmm... yah" he replied before eyes shifting nervously to mask the malu situation at hand. BWAHAHAHA...
Commenting on the fact that I actually went to a sex shop and asked how much does a cock pump for bob costs, he said: "Wahhh, kiat is so liberate..." *Time stood still again* I stopped twiddling the controls of the winning eleven soccer game on PS2, and turned around to laugh at malau. Everyone did too in a split second. To which, huili slaps malau for embarassing her. Kekekeke...

Shit, I can't think of any already. I'm sure there are plenty more. Oh wait, yes... the cycling trip at east coast where he cycled into a rubbish bin. Oh wells, anybody wanna write on that? Or should I leave it for my next post?

Ahhh..our mockumentary.

2005-11-28T11:31:00.000+08:00

As I sit here revelling in the debacle that will surely ensue when we get this mini drama/"mockumentary" series going, I cannot help but to include this link which inspired us to act upon a project we've been dying to do for years. Here you go: http://www.danielhsia.com/m_squat.php In the spirit of the recent opening of the SEA games, MAY THE BRIANSTORMING AND MAYHEM BEGAN! =)

Monkey business 1

2005-11-27T22:32:00.000+08:00

Let me draw the first blood. As discussed over teh tarek last night, we can have a theme of "Bad Language" embodied within the life of Malau ala James the Hunk. We want to show that bad language is James and James is bad language. Why James cannot speak properly? Is is because of a bad childhood with crazy Ah Mah terrorizing little James? Or is its because of because of the Gahmen's speak english/chinese/tamil/malay campaigns? Or is it because James reads too much of the Newd Paper? And we can also not forget James's chinese teacher Huang Biyu who never failed to throw his chinese homework out of the classroom.We can also bring up issues like what we get to watch on TV (where bad language can be turned into a household spectacle on Tong Xin Yuan by Mr Png). Hmm...let's not go into details..the internet is not safe anymore. More importantly, we can play on the satire that James is actually an undergraduate in a University ranked highly in the world. So much being said, how can be incorporate other characters into the show? I dun mind being the sickly and pasty boy.

Monkey business

2005-11-25T23:27:00.000+08:00

Yes, mongnet will be the star of our show. Right now, I think our most immediate task is to list down the "miiiiillions" *mock The Rock's voice* of incidents where our furry friend have embarrassed himself in front of many others (regardless of the central theme). It would be a good start eh?

And guys, please put down your email address on the tag board so that I can add you all the contributor's board mmkay?

Okay, to make sure everyone does their part, each contributor can only list 3 incidents of malau's malu-ness. Only after everyone on the board has done so, then another round of brainstorming will begin until all options have been expended. Then we'll see how to move on from there, cool?

Let me start first hor...

Sunday soccer malau says "Eh ehhh, lemme take cos emma dead piece specialist" (O_o"). What the fark? Dead ball + Set piece = Dead Piece? Maannn, were we stumped there...
We were walking past a electronics store when malau suddenly goes "WAAAAHHH!!!" at a sexually graphic scene being displayed on the TV set. Sipeh malu man... cannot appreciate quietly one... *tsk*
Malau's almost non-existent threshold level for alcohol. Quarter of a can of Jolly Shandy knocks him out COLD. And I was locked out of my hotel room in Bangkok on a history field trip back in AHS because of that. Omae yo yawai...

Actually come to think of it, whether these incidents are factual or ficticious doesn't really matter. You can give a radical spin on events like what our dear Captain Simian loves to do, or come up with just about any shit to write on him. Heck lah, he's the one getting flamed, why should we care??! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Our dream begins here...

2005-11-25T03:41:00.000+08:00

Hola amigos, this could be the start of interesting things to come. Our fledging ambition to shoot our very own docu-movie has spurred the imagination of many through frequent pow wow sessions over supper at bedok simpang. Today, we don't need to talk and talk and talk without putting it into action. We don't believe in the "chui kong lan pah song" style epitomised by Bobby Du. Action bedek only. Nabeh. Kanasai. Therefore today, we take our first step into creating movie clips that will not only provide laughter among us guys, but instead achieve our ultimate goal of sharing this with the wider community on the net. I ask for the contributors to be proactive and brainstorm ideas which we will then put online for discussion. This blog will thus be the medium of communication for everyone and also the primary vehicle for the formulation of the script, and ultimately the docu-movie itself. Peace out people.